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Thursday, March 25, 2010
Friday, March 12, 2010
Phrases I Enjoy ....
I came across two different phrases recently that really hit home with me so I'd like to share them here.
The first is:
This one is particularly meaningful to me because the focus of one of my recurring nightmares is writing an exam (or being tested in some way). In these dreams I either don't know where to go to write it, or I've missed it, or I don't know the material being tested. Thinking about life from the view that you must be prepared to be tested sometimes takes all the fun away from the learning process.
The second is:
I think of myself as an eternal student, so this phrase just appealed to me. I hope that I can be open-minded and learning new things right up until the last day I'm alive.
The first is:
Life is moments of discovery - not an exam!
This one is particularly meaningful to me because the focus of one of my recurring nightmares is writing an exam (or being tested in some way). In these dreams I either don't know where to go to write it, or I've missed it, or I don't know the material being tested. Thinking about life from the view that you must be prepared to be tested sometimes takes all the fun away from the learning process.
The second is:
Never assume that what you know is all there is to know and what you have experienced so far is all there is to experience.
I think of myself as an eternal student, so this phrase just appealed to me. I hope that I can be open-minded and learning new things right up until the last day I'm alive.
My Love of All Things New
I've known this about myself for a long time... I am happy when I'm learning something new. What I hadn't fully recognized until recently was how that applied to so many different parts of my daily life.
To start with, I suppose that is why I've had multiple careers. I remember always being very excited at the start of each one of them, especially when the learning curve seemed to be uphill right from the get go. As soon as that curve flattened out, so did my enthusiasm for the work. In fact, I was happiest if I was continually growing with my job and, at the same time, training someone to eventually replace me. It seemed like I always knew I was meant to move on.
Today, I don't have job skills that I am trying to acquire - just life skills. My love for learning new things hasn't diminished nor has the excitement it brings me. The difference, now, is that I find "newness" in unexpected places.
In the past, it hadn't been obvious to me that my love of discovering everything there was to know about someone was part of this trend. I never found chatter of a superficial nature very satisfying. I liked the ideas that sprung forth during conversations about the forbidden topics (like religion and politics) far more.
That's why I have come to the realization that people are truly wonderful; they are constantly in a state of change. I find that there is always something new to learn about even your closest and dearest family and friends. What a terrific find this has been for me. By moving my focus away from work related newness to exploring the difference in people, I have found an exciting playground. Each individual is like a snowflake to me - similar in their makeup, yet wondrous and unique.
What I can't figure out is how "newness" differs from "change" (which seems to evoke a different response from me altogether). Apparently, a question I will have to ponder on another day.
To start with, I suppose that is why I've had multiple careers. I remember always being very excited at the start of each one of them, especially when the learning curve seemed to be uphill right from the get go. As soon as that curve flattened out, so did my enthusiasm for the work. In fact, I was happiest if I was continually growing with my job and, at the same time, training someone to eventually replace me. It seemed like I always knew I was meant to move on.
Today, I don't have job skills that I am trying to acquire - just life skills. My love for learning new things hasn't diminished nor has the excitement it brings me. The difference, now, is that I find "newness" in unexpected places.
In the past, it hadn't been obvious to me that my love of discovering everything there was to know about someone was part of this trend. I never found chatter of a superficial nature very satisfying. I liked the ideas that sprung forth during conversations about the forbidden topics (like religion and politics) far more.
That's why I have come to the realization that people are truly wonderful; they are constantly in a state of change. I find that there is always something new to learn about even your closest and dearest family and friends. What a terrific find this has been for me. By moving my focus away from work related newness to exploring the difference in people, I have found an exciting playground. Each individual is like a snowflake to me - similar in their makeup, yet wondrous and unique.
What I can't figure out is how "newness" differs from "change" (which seems to evoke a different response from me altogether). Apparently, a question I will have to ponder on another day.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
A Little Something About “Mindfulness Meditation”
Mindfulness Meditation, for me, is about living in the now. I think that the phrase “being present” seems to capture its essence.
Living in the “now” is something I’ve always found difficult to do. My life seems to be either directed towards what has happened, my past, or what is about to happen, my future. There are only selective activities that I partake in that engulf me so thoroughly that I am truly focused on the present.
When one engages in Mindfulness Meditation, you are tuning into what is happening around you, and yes, even to you. It is as simple as becoming more aware of the feeling of your lungs expanding as you suck air into your body with each breath you take in, and then experiencing its opposite, the feeling of contraction as the breath is pushed out by your diaphragm. You are conscious and aware of yourself and your surroundings including everything that you see, hear and feel. You use your mind to focus on what you might normally have experienced only at a subconscious level. You attend to every moment without judgment.
The prelude in my life to this form of meditation arise from activities that consume me to the point that I can only focus on the moment. They include golfing, bowling, camping, problem solving and, I was surprised when, arguing, came to mind too. There are probably many more, but these are some of the most consistent. They are the ones that need my total concentration to perform. And certainly, the level of interest I bring to an activity ensures that my mind is less likely to wander off, too. For me, these are good exercises in helping me achieve a state of “being” – just living in the moment.
I have friends who seem to have no trouble living in the present. They have my sincere admiration. For me, I’m still learning to enjoy the ride.
Living in the “now” is something I’ve always found difficult to do. My life seems to be either directed towards what has happened, my past, or what is about to happen, my future. There are only selective activities that I partake in that engulf me so thoroughly that I am truly focused on the present.
When one engages in Mindfulness Meditation, you are tuning into what is happening around you, and yes, even to you. It is as simple as becoming more aware of the feeling of your lungs expanding as you suck air into your body with each breath you take in, and then experiencing its opposite, the feeling of contraction as the breath is pushed out by your diaphragm. You are conscious and aware of yourself and your surroundings including everything that you see, hear and feel. You use your mind to focus on what you might normally have experienced only at a subconscious level. You attend to every moment without judgment.
The prelude in my life to this form of meditation arise from activities that consume me to the point that I can only focus on the moment. They include golfing, bowling, camping, problem solving and, I was surprised when, arguing, came to mind too. There are probably many more, but these are some of the most consistent. They are the ones that need my total concentration to perform. And certainly, the level of interest I bring to an activity ensures that my mind is less likely to wander off, too. For me, these are good exercises in helping me achieve a state of “being” – just living in the moment.
I have friends who seem to have no trouble living in the present. They have my sincere admiration. For me, I’m still learning to enjoy the ride.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Letting Go of Stress
Stress is something we do to ourselves. The question is ... "Does it serve us?" And if not, why the heck are we doing this to ourselves?
During our evolutionary beginnings, I think that nature intended stress to be a protective reaction to our environment - the fight or flight response to danger. Our senses would catch wind of something that was potentially dangerous and put us on edge ... ready for the fight or poised for the retreat.
Today, we have developed to the point where stress is not only a reaction to external stimuli but also to our internal head chatter - that little voice that's always rattling on in your mind (at least mine is).
I feel like I have very little stress in my life these days. Quite an accomplishment, since it wasn't all that long ago when I continually felt stressed out.
Certainly, being retired helped - but perhaps in a way you wouldn't have expected.
It's seems silly now, but the first thing you do is replace all your work problems with more personal ones. I tried not to say bigger, more important problems with smaller, less important ones since whatever problems you are facing, well, they always seem big and important to you - don't they? Just ask any troubled teenager and they'll tell you that their sky is falling. (Does that prove my point?)
I believe, that we never really get away from problems. They're just a fact of life. So what retirement did do for me was, it allowed me the time to reflect. I reflected on everything and I concluded that everything is just the way it's supposed to be - perfect.
Now that doesn't mean I don't want things to be different - that would make me superhuman. What it does mean is that, in any given moment, I can accept things for being just the way they are.
So when I'm rushing off and need to be somewhere at a given time and the light turns red putting me behind schedule, that's just the way it is. In that moment, I can't change it, perhaps I wouldn't even want to if I knew what that change would result in. Think about it for a moment. If I ran the red light, maybe I got into a car accident. The possibilities are endless.
Just remember that some stress in your life is a good thing. It gives you the edge you need to do certain tasks. But too much stress affects your immune system and, voila, you get sick.
So, keep the stress in your life working for you by remembering that life, in any single moment, is perfect just the way it is. And if you can't believe that it's perfect, then at least acknowledge that it's not worth stressing over things you have no control over. I guarantee that you will feel less stress.
Trust the universe. It knows the bigger picture.
During our evolutionary beginnings, I think that nature intended stress to be a protective reaction to our environment - the fight or flight response to danger. Our senses would catch wind of something that was potentially dangerous and put us on edge ... ready for the fight or poised for the retreat.
Today, we have developed to the point where stress is not only a reaction to external stimuli but also to our internal head chatter - that little voice that's always rattling on in your mind (at least mine is).
I feel like I have very little stress in my life these days. Quite an accomplishment, since it wasn't all that long ago when I continually felt stressed out.
Certainly, being retired helped - but perhaps in a way you wouldn't have expected.
It's seems silly now, but the first thing you do is replace all your work problems with more personal ones. I tried not to say bigger, more important problems with smaller, less important ones since whatever problems you are facing, well, they always seem big and important to you - don't they? Just ask any troubled teenager and they'll tell you that their sky is falling. (Does that prove my point?)
I believe, that we never really get away from problems. They're just a fact of life. So what retirement did do for me was, it allowed me the time to reflect. I reflected on everything and I concluded that everything is just the way it's supposed to be - perfect.
Now that doesn't mean I don't want things to be different - that would make me superhuman. What it does mean is that, in any given moment, I can accept things for being just the way they are.
So when I'm rushing off and need to be somewhere at a given time and the light turns red putting me behind schedule, that's just the way it is. In that moment, I can't change it, perhaps I wouldn't even want to if I knew what that change would result in. Think about it for a moment. If I ran the red light, maybe I got into a car accident. The possibilities are endless.
Just remember that some stress in your life is a good thing. It gives you the edge you need to do certain tasks. But too much stress affects your immune system and, voila, you get sick.
So, keep the stress in your life working for you by remembering that life, in any single moment, is perfect just the way it is. And if you can't believe that it's perfect, then at least acknowledge that it's not worth stressing over things you have no control over. I guarantee that you will feel less stress.
Trust the universe. It knows the bigger picture.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Be Grateful And More Will Follow
I'm always amazed and excited when I have an "Aha" moment in my life and it just makes me want to share it with everyone I know. Guess what. I had one just the other day, so here goes.
Let me set the stage first... Now that I'm retired, I'm living on a budget for what seems to be the very first time in my life. Before retirement, I had enough money to cover my spending habits - never tracking my spending closely but always living within our means and setting something aside for those rainy days. We were quite successful at applying these guidelines - but now that the equity markets are down and the interest rates are low - I have limited means of replenishing any monies that I spend. Naturally, not wanting to go through my savings too quickly, I'm constantly evaluating my spending based on necessity and the elusive "fun" factor associated with my spending (am I getting enough pleasure from what I buy).
Okay, with the stage now set, here's the story.
I like to meditate on topics that I want an inspired solution for. Recently, I've been meditating on how I can bring in more money. My "Aha" came when I recognize that the universe had already been providing me with what I wanted - in small ways. Looking over the things on my desk, I noticed that I had all kinds of money just waiting to be received by me. To start, I had a $50 manufacturer's rebate to mail in; next, there were a bunch of health care receipts to submit to my group health provider for refund; and lastly, I already had a Group Health Care cheque to deposit for dental care already received and paid for. These items had been sitting around for awhile - going unnoticed and therefore their value being under appreciated by me.
It's like a light came on for me. I immediately dealt with these things and guess what ... more followed.
The first was an offer to stay for free in Mexico with an old friend and his wife at their timeshare. As you can recognize, free is always good when you're retired - it equates to saving money. This was particularly neat since we had been talking about some sort of vacation down south in either January or February earlier.
Next, I wanted to acknowledge the loss of my friend's mother by gifting her Rona Maynard's book about Mothers and Daughters. I had a particularly hectic day planned and as I was about to walk out the door got the notion to jump online and arm myself with some price checking before I left to get my actual shopping done. I couldn't believe it - 83% off. I picked up the book for $5.99 plus $10.00 to cover shipping costs. Later that day, I thought the price was so good, I should pick up another copy - no such luck - sold out. I couldn't believe that just an impulse to go online at just the right time saved me about $35 - very exciting.
My last little tale is about saving $200 at Canadian Tire. It's Saturday and my husband tells me that we missed a great sale. When I asked him to explain, he says a tool he has wanted to pick up is on sale - the sale started yesterday, however, and he figures they'll be sold out by now. Needing to return a couple of items, I told him that I would check for him. I won't go into all the details, but it was like one had been put away for me and was just waiting for pick-up. My shopping experience kept leading me to helpful store clerks who first located a store that hadn't yet run out of the tool, and then, once at the store, helped me locate the item - a small supply still left undiscovered in the storage area. It felt like a tag team effect going from one store clerk to the next ending with me getting the tool handed to me.
For most of my life, I have believed in a friendly and generous universe that is here to support us. I have recognized for myself that I often take things for granted - especially if they are routine or small. I sometimes forget that an attitude of gratefulness keeps the energies of abundance flowing my way. I sense that this was a nudge to remind me.
Let me set the stage first... Now that I'm retired, I'm living on a budget for what seems to be the very first time in my life. Before retirement, I had enough money to cover my spending habits - never tracking my spending closely but always living within our means and setting something aside for those rainy days. We were quite successful at applying these guidelines - but now that the equity markets are down and the interest rates are low - I have limited means of replenishing any monies that I spend. Naturally, not wanting to go through my savings too quickly, I'm constantly evaluating my spending based on necessity and the elusive "fun" factor associated with my spending (am I getting enough pleasure from what I buy).
Okay, with the stage now set, here's the story.
I like to meditate on topics that I want an inspired solution for. Recently, I've been meditating on how I can bring in more money. My "Aha" came when I recognize that the universe had already been providing me with what I wanted - in small ways. Looking over the things on my desk, I noticed that I had all kinds of money just waiting to be received by me. To start, I had a $50 manufacturer's rebate to mail in; next, there were a bunch of health care receipts to submit to my group health provider for refund; and lastly, I already had a Group Health Care cheque to deposit for dental care already received and paid for. These items had been sitting around for awhile - going unnoticed and therefore their value being under appreciated by me.
It's like a light came on for me. I immediately dealt with these things and guess what ... more followed.
The first was an offer to stay for free in Mexico with an old friend and his wife at their timeshare. As you can recognize, free is always good when you're retired - it equates to saving money. This was particularly neat since we had been talking about some sort of vacation down south in either January or February earlier.
Next, I wanted to acknowledge the loss of my friend's mother by gifting her Rona Maynard's book about Mothers and Daughters. I had a particularly hectic day planned and as I was about to walk out the door got the notion to jump online and arm myself with some price checking before I left to get my actual shopping done. I couldn't believe it - 83% off. I picked up the book for $5.99 plus $10.00 to cover shipping costs. Later that day, I thought the price was so good, I should pick up another copy - no such luck - sold out. I couldn't believe that just an impulse to go online at just the right time saved me about $35 - very exciting.
My last little tale is about saving $200 at Canadian Tire. It's Saturday and my husband tells me that we missed a great sale. When I asked him to explain, he says a tool he has wanted to pick up is on sale - the sale started yesterday, however, and he figures they'll be sold out by now. Needing to return a couple of items, I told him that I would check for him. I won't go into all the details, but it was like one had been put away for me and was just waiting for pick-up. My shopping experience kept leading me to helpful store clerks who first located a store that hadn't yet run out of the tool, and then, once at the store, helped me locate the item - a small supply still left undiscovered in the storage area. It felt like a tag team effect going from one store clerk to the next ending with me getting the tool handed to me.
For most of my life, I have believed in a friendly and generous universe that is here to support us. I have recognized for myself that I often take things for granted - especially if they are routine or small. I sometimes forget that an attitude of gratefulness keeps the energies of abundance flowing my way. I sense that this was a nudge to remind me.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Getting Perspective
I recently started following a blog called "Perfectly Cursed Life" by Kim. I found it by accident (if you believe in such things) while I was checking out Rona Maynard's site. I enjoy Kim's bent on life and recently had some thoughts of my own on her perspective of Taylor Swift (Read Kim's "A Little Bit of Perspective", Nov 16, 2009 ).
Before I begin, I'd like to state that I'm not a fan of Taylor Swift's - I haven't listened to her enough to know whether I like, or dislike, her music. I did, however, see her interviewed once and thought that she was a lovely young girl with a beautiful voice. This isn't about Taylor Swift - it's about perspective.
My own thought train started when I felt that Kim, while focusing on what a person with inexperience lacks, failed to acknowledge their value - seeing life through innocent eyes. Whereas, I agree that the accumulation of experience as time passes can change our perception of past events, at the same time, I think it should be acknowledged that the original experience - just as it happened - may have its own merits. In the case of youthful naivety, sadly, once our own innocence has been lost, sometimes it is only through remembering our past that we can awaken that child-like sense of wonder and belief we may wish to draw upon again.
Aside from whatever thoughts I had, I believe Kim was actually wondering how much time needs to go by before her own improved perspective became valid.
So how much time is enough?
I don't think that there is a right or a wrong answer to this question.
Now that I'm in my 50's, I know I see things differently than when I was in my 20's, my 30's or my 40's. I suppose my perspective will continue to change as I enter my 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's (if I'm lucky). I see and appreciate different things as my focus in life changes and I'm not so quick to discount the value of things that didn't hold much value to me before.
My belief is that your perspective is always valuable - at all points in time - particularly because it is ever-changing.
Before I begin, I'd like to state that I'm not a fan of Taylor Swift's - I haven't listened to her enough to know whether I like, or dislike, her music. I did, however, see her interviewed once and thought that she was a lovely young girl with a beautiful voice. This isn't about Taylor Swift - it's about perspective.
My own thought train started when I felt that Kim, while focusing on what a person with inexperience lacks, failed to acknowledge their value - seeing life through innocent eyes. Whereas, I agree that the accumulation of experience as time passes can change our perception of past events, at the same time, I think it should be acknowledged that the original experience - just as it happened - may have its own merits. In the case of youthful naivety, sadly, once our own innocence has been lost, sometimes it is only through remembering our past that we can awaken that child-like sense of wonder and belief we may wish to draw upon again.
Aside from whatever thoughts I had, I believe Kim was actually wondering how much time needs to go by before her own improved perspective became valid.
So how much time is enough?
I don't think that there is a right or a wrong answer to this question.
Now that I'm in my 50's, I know I see things differently than when I was in my 20's, my 30's or my 40's. I suppose my perspective will continue to change as I enter my 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's (if I'm lucky). I see and appreciate different things as my focus in life changes and I'm not so quick to discount the value of things that didn't hold much value to me before.
My belief is that your perspective is always valuable - at all points in time - particularly because it is ever-changing.
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