Tip #4 - Live Life As If It Could End (It Eventually Does)

I just had to say something about the end of the world today; afterall, we are on the last day of the Mayan calendar and who knows what will happen at midnight (said with my tongue in my cheek).

Many moons ago (we won't say how many), when I was a mere slip of a girl (early 20's), I participated in an exercise about setting your priorities.

To summarize, we started by envisioning that we had been invited, on short notice, to join friends on a wonderful vacation trip.  Motivated by something we truly wanted, how quickly could we tie up loose ends, get our essential work done, get packed, etc.?

Now, how would you do it with a time restriction of just a day or two?

The result is that you have now confirmed for yourself that you have the ability to make choices and get organized when properly motivated.

Next, take the exercise to another level.  Imagine that you have been given bad news by your physician and you only have 10 years, 5 years, 4 years, 3 years, 2 years or 1 year to live.  What becomes important in your life given these timeframes?  What feels undone?

Is it any easier to set your priorities with these thoughts in the back of your mind?

I've also enjoyed a couple of other tips when doing these types of exercises.  The first one comes from the book Don't Sweat the Small Stuff - "Your inbox will never be empty."  The second is also along the same lines and comes from Ether and Jerry Hicks through The Teachings of Abraham - "You will never be finished."  I find that these sayings take some of the stress away when I am feeling overwhelmed and also they remind me that life is not a race to the finishline.

So hopefully, we'll all be here tomorrow and now you have some interesting tools to help you with your New Year's Eve goal setting.

Phrases I Enjoy ....

I came across two different phrases recently that really hit home with me so I'd like to share them here.

The first is:

Life is moments of discovery - not an exam!

This one is particularly meaningful to me because the focus of one of my recurring nightmares is writing an exam (or being tested in some way).  In these dreams I either don't know where to go to write it, or I've missed it, or I don't know the material being tested. Thinking about life from the view that you must be prepared to be tested sometimes takes all the fun away from the learning process.

The second is:

Never assume that what you know is all there is to know and what you have experienced so far is all there is to experience.

I think of myself as an eternal student, so this phrase just appealed to me.  I hope that I can be open-minded and learning new things right up until the last day I'm alive.

Letting Go of Stress

Stress is something we do to ourselves. The question is ... "Does it serve us?" And if not, why the heck are we doing this to ourselves?

During our evolutionary beginnings, I think that nature intended stress to be a protective reaction to our environment - the fight or flight response to danger. Our senses would catch wind of something that was potentially dangerous and put us on edge ... ready for the fight or poised for the retreat.

Today, we have developed to the point where stress is not only a reaction to external stimuli but also to our internal head chatter - that little voice that's always rattling on in your mind (at least mine is).

I feel like I have very little stress in my life these days. Quite an accomplishment, since it wasn't all that long ago when I continually felt stressed out.

Certainly, being retired helped - but perhaps in a way you wouldn't have expected.

It's seems silly now, but the first thing you do is replace all your work problems with more personal ones. I tried not to say bigger, more important problems with smaller, less important ones since whatever problems you are facing, well, they always seem big and important to you - don't they? Just ask any troubled teenager and they'll tell you that their sky is falling. (Does that prove my point?)

I believe, that we never really get away from problems. They're just a fact of life. So what retirement did do for me was, it allowed me the time to reflect. I reflected on everything and I concluded that everything is just the way it's supposed to be - perfect.

Now that doesn't mean I don't want things to be different - that would make me superhuman. What it does mean is that, in any given moment, I can accept things for being just the way they are.

So when I'm rushing off and need to be somewhere at a given time and the light turns red putting me behind schedule, that's just the way it is. In that moment, I can't change it, perhaps I wouldn't even want to if I knew what that change would result in. Think about it for a moment. If I ran the red light, maybe I got into a car accident. The possibilities are endless.

Just remember that some stress in your life is a good thing. It gives you the edge you need to do certain tasks. But too much stress affects your immune system and, voila, you get sick.

So, keep the stress in your life working for you by remembering that life, in any single moment, is perfect just the way it is. And if you can't believe that it's perfect, then at least acknowledge that it's not worth stressing over things you have no control over. I guarantee that you will feel less stress.

Trust the universe. It knows the bigger picture.

Getting Perspective

I recently started following a blog called "Perfectly Cursed Life" by Kim. I found it by accident (if you believe in such things) while I was checking out Rona Maynard's site. I enjoy Kim's bent on life and recently had some thoughts of my own on her perspective of Taylor Swift (Read Kim's "A Little Bit of Perspective", Nov 16, 2009 ).

Before I begin, I'd like to state that I'm not a fan of Taylor Swift's - I haven't listened to her enough to know whether I like, or dislike, her music. I did, however, see her interviewed once and thought that she was a lovely young girl with a beautiful voice. This isn't about Taylor Swift - it's about perspective.

My own thought train started when I felt that Kim, while focusing on what a person with inexperience lacks, failed to acknowledge their value - seeing life through innocent eyes. Whereas, I agree that the accumulation of experience as time passes can change our perception of past events, at the same time, I think it should be acknowledged that the original experience - just as it happened - may have its own merits. In the case of youthful naivety, sadly, once our own innocence has been lost, sometimes it is only through remembering our past that we can awaken that child-like sense of wonder and belief we may wish to draw upon again.

Aside from whatever thoughts I had, I believe Kim was actually wondering how much time needs to go by before her own improved perspective became valid.

So how much time is enough?

I don't think that there is a right or a wrong answer to this question.

Now that I'm in my 50's, I know I see things differently than when I was in my 20's, my 30's or my 40's. I suppose my perspective will continue to change as I enter my 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's (if I'm lucky). I see and appreciate different things as my focus in life changes and I'm not so quick to discount the value of things that didn't hold much value to me before.

My belief is that your perspective is always valuable - at all points in time - particularly because it is ever-changing.