Enjoy the Ride!

Life is a highway so why not make the ride a joyous one!

Life Tip:

Focus on the joys in your daily life by either thinking about, or talking about, them.  Appreciation for what is working in our daily routines - no matter how small - can go a long way in helping us feel good.

Tip #3 - Be Mindful to What Makes You Feel Happy

I had a wonderful day today.  We are getting close to the Holiday Season and everywhere I turn there are chocolates being offered to me.  What's better than that? :)

Also, I've been spending time with my friends at seasonal events and having great fun just socializing and enjoying the beautiful decor.  All this helps me to feel happy!

So can I use this to keep my spirits up? Sure.

If you know what helps you to feel happy (being mindful of the conditions that exist when you do feel happy), just closing your eyes and imagining or reliving the event in a daydream-like state often can bring a smile to your face and hopefully to your heart.

Just try it.  Start by identifying something that helps you to feel happy or an event where you were happy.  Then, take a quiet moment, close your eyes and using your imagination create a daydream that uplifts your spirit.

Good luck and think happy thoughts - remember, by adding just a little pixie dust you just might be able to fly.

Sandy Hook - Where to start the healing process

I never know what to say when something as violent and, in my mind, senseless, as the murders at Sandy Hook takes place.  I'm absolutely heart-broken.

I've listened to the news reports, watched the various discussions and read numerous commentaries.  Obviously, there are no simple solutions to ensuring that something like this doesn't happen again; BUT FOR GOODNESS SAKE, DO SOMETHING!

National or, hopefully, world-wide change doesn't happen overnight.  It all starts with little changes.

Picture a very large oceanliner cutting through the waters of the ocean.  Everything is great until you realize that you are heading in the wrong direction.  Even when everyone is in agreement that the ship must be redirected, it takes the order from the captain which must then be executed by the crew to even start the process.  Next, turning the ship is gradual - you can't turn an oceanliner on a dime.

At this point, I think we've finally reached the mark where we agree that we are heading in the wrong direction.  The problem - we still haven't agreed upon the precise direction we should be heading.  Troubling to say the least.

My take is to start at a personal level.

If you think that we can ensure personal security by increased gun controls and/or taxes on gun ownership - start at home - don't own a gun or ensure that you are a responsible owner by locking up your weapon(s).  Do more - express your opinion and encourage your family, friends, and community to do likewise.  Let your local politicans know how you feel.

If you would like to live in a society that is sensitive to the feelings and needs of its members - be that kind of neighbour.

Be mindful of whether your message is one of love or one of control.  Consider that you can choose to be kind and loving to anyone, but you can only control your own behaviour.  Trying to dictate the actions and choices of others, in my opinion, is never a successful long-term strategy.

Anyway, I don't want to get preachy.

My advice, the best way to make the world a better place happens by taking baby steps - identify what you can do personally (there is always something no matter how small) and act on it.

My heartfelt sympathy to all those who felt a loss as a result of this tragic event.

 

Tip #2 - Talk about what you want

So why do so many of us fall into conversational ruts with our friends where we discuss so many things that we don't like or don't want in our lives?  Wouldn't we be happier if we talked about what we do like and what gets our engines roaring?

Try spending the day talking from your "happy place" and see how much better you feel!

Have a great day sharing your good feelings about life.

What Type of Chatty Cathy Lives in Your Head?

I have a Chatty Cathy living inside my head - that's how I refer to the constant internal mind chatter that goes on there.

She never seems to stop, and often, in the past, I have totally ignored her. I just let her run loose in the background, not paying much conscious attention to her ramblings. It wasn't till I became more mindful of our conversations that I recognized that this was an effective form of subliminal programming - only I was doing it to myself. Basically, I was allowing her to program my subconscious mind without censorship. Now, if she was only saying nice things about me, that wouldn't be so bad - but my Chatty Cathy seems to be somewhat neurotic, a bit of a worry-wart, and an out-and-out nay-sayer - so you can just imagine what my subconscious mind has been programmed with for years.

Today, I am more aware of her chatterings. In fact, I have found that being mindful of our internal mind chatter is one of the greatest tools we have for creating the life we truly want for ourselves.

So, what does it mean to be mindful of our internal mind chatter?

I think we all know what "internal mind chatter" refers to - it's that voice in our heads that is constantly commenting on our lives. It sometimes comes across as a repeat of things our parents drilled into us; other times it's commentary on something we just did or said.

For example, have you ever just stammered a hello to someone you really liked and then walked away scolding yourself with, "What was I thinking? He must think I'm an absolute idiot. He doesn't even know I exist." and on and on. That's Chatty Cathy.

Actually, her intentions are good. She worries about me and doesn't want me to get hurt emotionally. However, in the past, her way of protecting me was to discourage me from putting my best foot forward. If I didn't expect too much out of life, or too much from myself, I would stay safe. But it's a complex web we weave. Instead, over time, Chatty Cathy had a negative impact on my self-esteem.

Today, by paying attention to my internal conversations, or, in other words, being mindful of what she is saying, I have developed a better relationship with her. Instead of blindly accepting all of her little snipes and cautionary comments, I challenge her or joke with her. When she tells me that I'm dreaming in technicolour, I respond by letting her know that even if I don't choose to act on this particular dream, vibrant colours make for more interesting daydreams. My intent is to question whether I believe what she is saying and to focus on examples from my life to prove her wrong when she is being negative or not supportive.

You might say, that in the form of Chatty Cathy, I am my own worst enemy. It is, however, my intention to transform this relationship.  One day, I hope to say, that she sounds like my number one fan and feels like my very best friend.

So what did your Chatty Cathy have to say to you today?

A Little Something About “Mindfulness Meditation”

Mindfulness Meditation, for me, is about living in the now. I think that the phrase “being present” seems to capture its essence.

Living in the “now” is something I’ve always found difficult to do.  My life seems to be either directed towards what has happened, my past, or what is about to happen, my future.  There are only selective activities that I partake in that engulf me so thoroughly that I am truly focused on the present.

When one engages in Mindfulness Meditation, you are tuning into what is happening around you, and yes, even to you.  It is as simple as becoming more aware of the feeling of your lungs expanding as you suck air into your body with each breath you take in, and then experiencing its opposite, the feeling of contraction as the breath is pushed out by your diaphragm.   You are conscious and aware of yourself and your surroundings including everything that you see, hear and feel.  You use your mind to focus on what you might normally have experienced only at a subconscious level.  You attend to every moment without judgment.

The prelude in my life to this form of meditation arise from activities that consume me to the point that I can only focus on the moment.  They include golfing, bowling, camping, problem solving and, I was surprised when, arguing, came to mind too.  There are probably many more, but these are some of the most consistent.  They are the ones that need my total concentration to perform.  And certainly, the level of interest I bring to an activity ensures that my mind is less likely to wander off, too.  For me, these are good exercises in helping me achieve a state of “being” – just living in the moment.

I have friends who seem to have no trouble living in the present.  They have my sincere admiration.  For me,  I’m still learning to enjoy the ride.